Struggles in Life

"Jesus Christ lives, knows us, watches over us, and cares for us. In moments of pain, loneliness, or confusion, we do not need to see Jesus Christ to know that He is aware of our circumstances and that His mission is to bless."
—Henry B. Eyring

Starting a New Chapter

I will try it again tomorrow. That was my motto for so many years of my marriage. Every day would go by, and I would feel insignificant. Like I wasn't doing enough to be a good mother, or wife. I was failing on some level until I realized how truly unhappy I was inside, and out.

Through the trials that the Lord has given me, I have seen that sometimes divorce really is the best option. Not just for the children involved but for the health of everyone in the situation. I should have known years ago that my marriage was over before it really started. Given the circumstances, and the shortcomings on both of our hands.

I wanted to marry a member, and became discouraged with the LDS dating scene. I settled, which I never suggest anyone do. It tried my faith over and over again. But the one thing still standing strong now is my testimony and love for my children. The greatest gift I have ever received.

I don't blog often, but I think I need to start. I need this private outlet through this time. I need the space to talk about what I can't on a daily basis.

I also want to be an example for positive divorces and co-parenting. I don't want this to be bitter and ugly. I don't want drawn out court proceedings and bitter custody battles. That just isn't my style and frankly I have always hated confrontation.

I will rely on the Lord through this time, and pray for the strength we will all need to make it through this transition.

Trial and a Biological Clock

Children are a gift from God. We are mere mortals that are chosen very carefully to give Earthly bodies to our Heavenly Father's children. To guide them, parent them and of course show them the way of the Lord.

I have been struggling deeply with the idea of having more children. I know my family is not complete with only three. My husband on the other hand doesn't think about the blessing of a baby but instead it is the dollar signs that come along with each new mouth to feed and body to clothe.

Could we afford a fourth or even a fifth child?  If we made some small changes in our life. We don't need 7000 channels on cable, or even a boat. These are luxuries I would easily give up to enjoy the blessing of being pregnant again.

I have been reading the Baby Making Machine blog and her funny posts on convincing her husband to have a baby in 30 days or less have really got me thinking about it again.

My youngest child is no longer a baby but a bright toddler so full of ambition and curiosity. I feel like it is just time again to fire up the old uterus and get going. Maybe I can work on 30 days to convincing my husband a fourth child won't be that big of a deal.

Gay Marriage - Everywhere You Look!

I live in a state that has legalized Gay Marriage. It is perfectly fine with me because it doesn't impact me in any way. I am a straight married woman. I got the great right to marry the man I love why should I feel like my religious morals should exclude someone from their rights as a citizen of the United States?

The Bible tells us that marriage is between a man and a woman, but issues of homosexuality weren't front and center when the Bible was written. Those who found themselves attracted to the opposite sex didn't know how to handle it because it was unheard of. But to think it was something that wasn't happening is foolishness.

Today marriage has become a joke. There are few and far between who take it as a serious religious commitment. The lavish weddings followed two years later by messy divorces is what marriage has become. You do not see people creating laws and state constitutional amendments to end the divorce process, or make laws on heterosexual marriage stricter. Which if they were really concerned about the sanctity of marriage - they would be doing it!

It all is coming down to basic civil rights that all American's should have. Telling a gay citizen they can't get married because of their sexual orientation is like telling a black person they can't get married because they are less of a citizen than someone who is white. It is just not acceptable under any circumstances. 80 years ago it was. In 2012 there should be no discrimination based on sex, sexual orientation, race, or social class.

The United States is supposed to have separation of church and state, which has recently been going out the window with Republican leaders who do not understand this concept.

Civil rights are civil rights. If one class of people is allowed to marry - all should be granted that same right. It is only what is fair in a democracy!

I am just so sickened and disgusted by the way the leaders of this country choose to treat people because of their social class or sexual preference.

I'm a Bad Blogger

I got sick. Really sick. Like someone hit me with a  bus kind of sick.

My husband had to take days off from work for the children, I spent a night in the hospital from extreme dehydration, I just was flat out sick.

I know virtually nobody reads my little tiny blog here, but I thought I owed some kind of an explanation as to why I just went off the radar. I am looking forward to getting back on the horse, but I am going to pace myself.

I don't want to get burnt out on a project that is supposed to be fun and a hobby.

Trials like this are something we are destined to deal with.

"Some might ask when faced with such suffering, how could Almighty God let this happen? And then that seemingly inevitable question, why did this happen to me? Why must we experience disease and events that disable or call precious family members home early or extend their years in pain? Why the heartaches? At these moments we can turn to the great plan of happiness authored by our Heavenly Father. That plan, when presented in the pre-earth life, prompted us all to shout for joy. Put simply, this life is training for eternal exaltation, and that process means tests and trials. It has always been so, and no one is spared." 

—Elder Ronald A. Rasband, "Special Lessons", General Conference, Apr. 2012

New Study Concludes "Christian Right" are Still Idiots

In a stunning new survey of the Christian Right in America, it shows that Jews are more favorable to Mormons and Muslims to these so called Christian Right Wing idiots.

The problem with this study and statement as a complete whole is the little missing piece of information that Mormon's are in fact Christians. Christians that don't know other Christians when they see them. What a freaking thought!

What bothers me is the ignorance of the general American population when it comes to my religion. I believe in Jesus Christ. I am a follower of Jesus Christ. Therefore I am a Christian.

I believe in the Bible. I believe in virtually everything your run of the mill Christian believes in. But of course because we use a different name with our church and identify as Mormons we are surely from another planet and not followers of Christ.

I am actually sure there is a large percent of the Christian Right who thinks Mormons follow that nut-case Warren Jeffs criminal and have half a dozen wives. In fact it is a sad day in America when polygamy is still directly linked to a church which has nothing to do with it.

I have been asked before if I am a sister wife. I am not kidding at all. No, my husband does not have other wives nor would he even if he was to choose to be baptized Mormon.

I am sure this is not going to be the end of ignorance with the election though. Because now we have a Mormon and a Muslim running. Totally being sarcastic on that one!

I just don't have much tolerance left for people who don't practice the Christian values they are continually peaching.

Wordless Wednesday ~ Make Room for the Lord